Translation of Mom's e-mail

She is going to punch me in the face for posting this, but I am pretty sure she knows I don't REALLY think this is true.

Below is an e-mail from my mom followed by my "translation" reply to the family.....I love giving her a hard time....she's great though and a good sport.  : )

Love ya Mom!!!!

FROM MOM:

Hi everyone,

We are having the cook out this Monday for Memorial Day.  I guess we will try to eat about 4:00 p.m. or so.

Dad is thinking that we will skip breakfast on Sunday since we are eating on Monday.

We will get the papers and give them to you on Monday.

Is that okay with everyone?  Love ya, Mom/Jan

MY TRANSLATION:

 

Hi everyone (except Jeff),

We are having the cook out this Monday for Memorial Day.
We are going to tell you we will eat at 4 then call you 100 times when we start eating at 330 and you aren't there yet.

Dad is thinking that we will skip breakfast on Sunday since we are eating on Monday. (Subliminal insert - everyone is still welcome for breakfast we just don't want Jeff to show up)
We will get the papers and give them to you on Monday. (We will rotate all of the good coupons into your paper and stick the ones for shampoo and stuff that is expired into Jeff's paper....as we normally do)
Is that okay with everyone? 
Love ya (except for Jeff),
Mom/Jan

(Just kidding Mom relax I know I'm not the favorite but I've accepted this). : )

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